It's Official: iPod No Longer Cool
"Never trust anyone over 30." – Hippie protest slogan.
"Never trust a hippie." - Johnny Rotten, Sex Pistols.
iPods may be remembered as the jet setting, iconic music machines of the early 21st century, but their days as an edgy fashion statement have clearly passed. Their hipness has certainly been eroded since moms started using them - but most recently, Dick Cheney hammered the final nail in iPod's coolness coffin by recharging his device on AF2. Yes, the Vice President occupied one of only two working power outlets on Air Force 2 during the return flight from a four nation tour of the Middle East. Apparently Cheney's need to recharge his iPod took priority over the press and anybody else trying to use the precious few AC outlets aboard AF2. But that seems only fair, after all it's his plane.
This means that not only has the iPod become a priority to the 60+ crowd but … c'mon it's Dick Cheney! This is the VP of the administration that made Senator Ted Stevens the Chairman of the Committee on Commerce, Science and Transportation. Sen. Stevens famously criticized the Net Neutrality Act by calling the Internet a "Series of Tubes". So, you kids out there wearing white ear buds for the fashion statement, take note! The iPod is now your conservative neo-con grandfather's MP3 player, and he calls the Internet a series of tubes and supports telecom domination of its content.
You can't exactly blame Steve Jobs for the geriatricizing of his product. It had to happen eventually. It's a rare consumer product that combines slick ease of use with distinctive stylishness. In the handful of years it's been out, we've seen the iPod go from edgy tech toy to mainstream must-have item. Soon you'll be able to download your favorite episodes of Matlock and Golden Girls from iTunes.
I bet you're wondering, what does Dick Cheney listen to on his iPod? I imagine a loop that endlessly plays the Imperial March from the Star Wars soundtrack inter-spliced with John Ashcroft's rendition of "Let the Eagle Soar". Apparently Cheney is fond of the oldies, music from the 40's and 50's, and has a fondness for Johnny Cash. Well, who doesn't like Johnny Cash?

